Posted: 22 Jun 2013 11:37 AM PDT
I talk to many people throughout my life that suffer with an IBD, either through Twitter (@MrAwesomeBen), my blog or my local Crohn’s and Colitis UK (Leicestershire & Rutland) charity. These people have become a cruck for me to rely on. They know, pretty much, what I am going through. These people, some of whom are complete strangers, people who I would not recognise if I passed them in the street, are there for me and vice-versa.
I bang on about not suffering alone, especially in this modern era of the internet where a new friendship with someone is only a click away. You can hide any embarrassment or anxiety behind the computer screen.
I class myself to be extremely lucky in this world. I found love. I found a woman to share my world with, who accepts me for what and who I am.
Granted neither of us knew at the beginning the trouble I would put us through with my diagnosis but I doubt that would have changed a thing. I struggle to remember a time where she wasn’t a part of my life.
Now I don’t want this blog to sound like one massive brag. I want to highlight that we are not all so lucky.
A fellow Crohnie “gets” you. They know the feelings you feel, they know the pain you suffer. They know all this because they have been in the same situation. You feel you can confide in them as you know they will not be judging you.
Whereas a spouse sometimes just doesn’t fully understand. This is not their fault but sometimes you need to talk to someone who has been to the depths you feel. Sometimes you find yourself so fed up with your IBD that you begin to get grouchy with the other half.
Sometimes your medication makes you tired, lethargic, irritable or sometimes it’s just the IBD symptoms driving you mad. You lash out on this one person you love the most. You take your frustrations out on them.
Now a good partner understands that you’re no meaning to be like this; they understand that it is a temporary glitch in your otherwise faultless personality!
Mrs Ben knows she is part of my healing. She gives me leeway when required; allows me time to myself to be a grump.
Not all Crohnies have this support at home. Their partners get angry and fed up with the IBD’er and basically tell them to get over it and offer no emotional support.
This post is dedicated to the partners of the Crohnie; the ones who don’t understand what their loved one is going through. You need to look back to the origins of your relationship and remember what it was like to love unconditionally. To give your partner a shoulder to cry on, offer them yourself as a punch bag to let all their emotion out. You may have forgotten that they need you. If they can’t let it out to you, then they will struggle to heal. We all need a good moan. You don’t need to offer help and advice, just be there, no matter what. Help and advice can come from us other Crohnies.
Vitamin D has dropped even though I’m on prescribed supplement tablets. My bloods have been taken and a new, different supplement has been prescribed to see if they help. With the sun showing his face a bit more, I’ve been out in the garden getting some natural Vit D flowing. Had a bit of a struggle cramp & pain wise recently, having to take a lot of pain killers and trying to watch my food intake. Mercaptopurine is still at 50mg at seems to be the best med so far. I’m fed up with constantly being drained. I’m so tired all of the time. My “get up and go” has got up and gone. Still smiling though. Life is what you make it and I’ve made mine a happy place. Keep well my friends.
- More from Me And My Crohns
Posted on December 2, 2013 Since being diagnosed over 6 years ago I have become very blasé about “popping” pills. There have been times in my treatment when I have been taking 12 pills before I had even had my morning wash. I guess I tried to be as ignorant as possible to what I was taking in a blind hope that they would offer some relief from my Crohn’s Disease symptoms. No matter what my ailment, there always seemed to be an extra pill that could be taken. Even now that I am more educated to what the medications Read More…
Posted: 22 Jun 2013 11:37 AM PDT I talk to many people throughout my life that suffer with an IBD, either through Twitter (@MrAwesomeBen), my blog or my local Crohn’s and Colitis UK (Leicestershire & Rutland) charity. These people have become a cruck for me to rely on. They know, pretty much, what I am going through. These people, some of whom are complete strangers, people who I would not recognise if I passed them in the street, are there for me and vice-versa. I bang on about not suffering alone, especially in this modern era of the internet where Read More…
Posted: 08 Apr 2013 05:52 AM PDT Hello to all my Crohnies old and new. I am sat writing this latest blog while slightly spaced out on pain killers, home off work due to my silly tummy and even sillier IBD. Over the weekend I helped celebrate my wife’s Grandma’s 90th birthday. This celebration included a lot of party food and subsequently led to a rather upset bowel. Yesterday saw me struggle with diarrhoea which I tried to control with loperamide tablets (Imodium) then during the night I had really bad cramps which meant I didn’t sleep well and had Read More…
Posted: 02 Jan 2013 10:36 AM PST I don’t know about you but I really don’t like giving up. I have always been stubborn but ever since my Crohn’s diagnosis I think I have become even more stubborn. I think I lie more too, nothing grand just little white lies about how well I am. These lies are not to mislead others; they are aimed at misleading myself. If I tell myself I am well enough to do something then most of the time I will do it. My stubbornness and self lies get me through most situations. I’m not Read More…
22 Apr 2012 Whenever I head out, I try and make sure I have my essentials. As I have explained before, as an IBD sufferer you always have to be prepared. A night out on the town is no different; in fact it probably needs a little more planning especially if you intend to have an alcoholic drink or two. Alcohol does have an effect on my body and that can make me a little tense and apprehensive. I probably shouldn’t drink alcohol but there are so many things my Crohn’s Disease stops me from enjoying, so alcohol, even with Read More…
May 15, 2011 Do you ever forget where the “Too much information” line is? I spend so much time around other Crohnies, close friends and family that I forget what is acceptable in everyday conversation. The regular guy in the street doesn’t really want to know about my bowel movements. When someone asks me a question with regards to Crohn’s, I plough straight in. Quite often describing many of the symptoms, side effects and affected areas of my body. I don’t seem to blush with embarrassment anymore. Does this mean I’m comfortable talking about bums? When I meet new people Read More…